*sings*
everybody hates me
nobody loves me
im gonna eat some worms....


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Tired Tired Tired!!!!!!
Realy tired until wanna die!!!!
Today had scythia outing..
Actually went there full of anticipation...
but after we reach there....
haiz... i was realy worried...
lyk wad can we do at such an ulu place???
We were even told that the water there cannot b drunk...
ewww... Imagine wads in the water???
Thoughout the whole day was walking walking n more walking...
Imagine Eileen walking 4 times of 3.2km walk under the hot sun with tonnes of Eileen-loving mosqitoes???
Not smth anybody would wanna find out...
Coz if those who are lyk realy v v v v close to me would actually noe that they are not gonna hav a nice walk as I AM GOING TO BE A TOTAL BITCH!!!!
Ok nt lyk i can help it...
Under hot sun, mosqito infested, sweaty and sore feet, i cant help it....
hahaha...
But while walking was quite fun la....
talked n had fun....
Moreover, looking at the bright side,
after walking so long.. and sweating so much
SOME CONSIDERABLE weight has to b lost!!!
May b lyk a kg or 2??
hahahaha....
nonetheless... it was quite fun la...
i love the part where i had to act out this phrase and let my other grp members guess wad it was...
coz i think that was the most fun part...
haha..... I am good at guessing!!
Lastly i would realy wanna thank my grp members for tolerating wif me n also having fun together....(though i would nv ever go there the second time unless some1 pays me to do it :P)


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After all that, actually i still wanted to go vivo...
but li bu chong xin...
was tired until die already...
and v hungry too..
so had to call off the trip....
but had a v v v v v v v fung fu dinner....
hahaha.. stringray and all... shared between 6 ppl....
v v v cheap...
cheap and nice....
made new friends too!!!
hahahaha....


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HE was also there...
but somehow i du hav the feel foe HIM already...
probably dun lyk HIM anymore...
hav a new eye-candy...
shall not tell any1 who...
hope he lyks me...
hahahaha.....
Violet can hav HIM all to herself as i dun lyk HIM anymore...
I saw germaine's eye-candy too...
he was a gl there...
hahahaha... talked a bit wif him and all...
but no feel for him..
nv had a feel for him though he was nt bad looking...
guess looks does not count to everyting....


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Sometimes i realy hate some part of me...
lyk makes me realy hate myself...
but cant help it...
realy wanna change that part of me..
tired v hard...
but i guess im juz me...
nth can b changed....
Everythime i say i wanna change..
i will forget.. thn will do it again...
makes me damn irritated, hate myself more n everything...
Am lyk v angry wif myself.... yet cannot do anything abt it...
haiz...
i feel that if i wann ppl to lyk me .. i need to first lyk myself..
Somehow.. i cant seem to do tht...
how to expect ppl to lyk me...
probably i will juz stay as a loner forever...
or mayb i will change in a few yrs time...
will keep trying...
Somehow i feel that i lyk smss friends more thn poly friends ...
ppl outside are more sensitive to things...
not as open as us...
i kind of feel more comfortable wif smss friends...
lyk more fun wif them and all...
haha.. feel so bad lo.. lyk lidat say them..
but any way its the truth wad...
they lyk nt very open 1...
If i dun lyk them, cant expect them to lyk me either... hahaha...


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