today was the last day for fow..
i duno y but i was damn disappointed..
though i sort of noe tat komez will lose already ..
im still disappointed...
n for the past 3 days..
i didnt really enjoy myself..
yes, it was realy fun playing wif the freshies..
but wif fellow grp members??
naaa...
i finally noe y the day b4 i went for fo, i was so nervous already...
this was actually becoz i was afraid of my own grp..
i even had thoughts of nt gng..
its not tat i hate komez or wad..
but its lyk i dun feel the bond there..
i was excited at 1st coz it was the camp i had been waiting for..
i wanted to b a GL..
ok.. 1st i wanna say that i failed as a GL, i failed being a team member..
its lyk.. wen i look at other empires cheer..
dun even mention the freshies from komez..
me myself will think, y am i in this grp n nt that grp..
its lyk.. feel v disappointed..
wanna cheer also no xim already...
i duno y.. but the bond in komez is juz not there...
its lyk.. i feel lyk a stranger there..
in fact, i feel more comfortable wif my freshies thn wif my fellow GLs..
i hav no idea y the hell other empires can b soo bonded..
they noe wen to do wad..
lyk everytime, they noe wad to cheer, n they cheer as a grp kind of thing..
ours will lyk lag..
thn wait for each other..
its my 1st time being a GL, im also learning how to do things..
im learning how to lead..
i also wanna do it..
but thing is that sometimes, asking me to lead on in a cheer or start a cheer, is damn hard...
i juz cant do it..
asking my to create zai cheers are even harder..
i dun hav the creativity to do it..
so haizzz... i duno la...
moreover, everytime during debrief, ours will b the LONGEST..
no doubt 1.. confirm 1..
v jialat 1 u noe..
that kind of feeling..
at night sleep that time also nt happy.. cannot smile...
thn today, after debrief, we talked abt alot of things..
alot of things were brought up..
thn a lot of head-on lyk .. talk..
ppl there was lyk.. okok.. we dun always stick to our own clique anymore..
frm 2morw onwards, komez will bond..
u think wad.. bond can create in 1 day??
impossible plz..
thn they say.. okok.. 2morw morning b4 gng school, we eat breakfast 2gether..
i also duno wad to say la..
its lyk not only me..
most of the ppl there dun feel a sense of belonging in komez..
including me... haiz...
hav this feeling of nt gng for foc 2morw..
but nvm lor.. juz go..
n im losing my voice soon!!! rahh!!
p.s.. if any ppl frm komez ever happen to c this.. im realy sorry...
coz im nt tat kind who can say this kind of thing in crowds..
so other thn my blog, i hav nowhere else to say all this..
no offence...